Robin 2

I spent 2 hours trying to make up my mind whether I wanted to go to a birthday party. I was invited after I had texted Happy birthday text to  Selena's friend's husband. I was always Selena's ...what would I call it... plus one... or ... puppy... you know the person who follows her and then everybody else accepts that out of pity she will sometimes take me to parties where I don't know anyone. And then her good friends got to know me, so me going somewhere with her became normal.  And eventually, since I am not too sociable, her friends became the only people I saw.
But, that day, I just couldn't make myself go there... I remembered that sometimes I don't even have anywhere to sit or anyone to talk to on that couple's parties. And, before, when I was obsessed with Selena it was a joy to be where she is, it didn't matter that I was the odd person out. Well, not exactly joyful... but that suffering was better than being home alone and lonely, away from Selena.
This time, however, I went into one of my decision paralyzed modes. When I have to leave the house sometimes I just can't make myself do it, and I usually end up cancelling whatever obligation I had because I run out of time to actually get there.
I got used to keeping my shitty moods to myself. Selena does not approve of such spoiled and impolite behavior like being depressed or getting into a vicious circle of thoughts you can't snap out of.
So, although I wanted to call Selena and see whether she's going, I ended up not doing anything but sitting on the bed and every once in a while realizing that I have stopped breathing and I am clenching my teeth trying to think of what to do. She didn't call me either, but that was not a surprise. Nervous and in a bad mood I was trying to watch a TV show when Robin called me.
-Robiiin!
- Hey, kiddow, you're back from the birthday?
- No, I didn't go.
-Why?
- I... - what to tell her? The truth might scare her off or bore her... ; lie... is not a good thing especially in the beginning of a relationship when it is equal to misrepresenting oneself ...
She sighed.
- Ok, the pause is telling me that you are thinking of what to tell me...and I don't want to hear anything but the truth. If you don't feel like telling me, it's ok, just please promise not to lie to me.
-aamm.. - I was so taken aback. I wasn't sure what to make of it... Except that she is freakin' smart! - I want to tell you, but I am scared that you might ...
-... not like you anymore? - she said and laughed.
-Yes...
- Ok, then, lets be brave...
-Easy for you to say!
-OK, kiddow, start talking! - and so I did, as fast and as detached from my emotions as I could (and I am pretty successful at both - years of practice)
-Woow... first... you can really talk fast... second... that is an issue we can solve... I am just sorry you didn't call me when you felt the mind freeze. I could have helped you.
- How? You're far away...
- Well, from your story I gather that you actually wanted to go this time, so I would have threatened you with a spanking if you didn't get ready right away. And you would send me selfies from the shower, the bus, the party and so on...
- And what if I didn't obey? - I asked with a broad smile. I've always wanted this!!! My whole life! And here she was in my life! The perfection!!
-Well, you would do it only once. And as I remember, I owe you a spanking from the parking lot. After that one you would obey me...
- I can't wait for you to come back!! - I said longingly and she out right laughed.