Robin 3

I was looking at my butt in the mirror... I had cellulite on my thighs and on the butt... and the butt was just too big... She will be disgusted by it.
Well, I love Selena although she is slightly overweight and has cellulite... but I have never had sex with her... I wanted her as my Top, but not so much as a sexual partner...
What if Robin takes one look at me naked and tells me that she has changed her mind about me! Maybe I could call her, tell her that I am sick, and starve myself for couple of days... start exercising... and then... maybe... oh... who am I kidding... I could never starve myself... I wish I was anorexic*..
Robin was calling me! She was downstairs!

***
A stern face awaited for me behind the wheel.
- Why weren't you ready?
- I am sorry...
- I know. But, I asked you a question. - I knew the tone, so I decided to go with honesty.
- I got freaked out about my weight and I spent too much time contemplating how to avoid the part where you see it... - her face immediately brightened up, she laughed, kissed me and started the car.
- It is unavoidable, honey.

After a couple of minutes I realized that we were not going to the restaurant.
-Where are we going?
- My place. So I can see your body. We'll have dinner later.
- No, no, no... please... please... I am not ready...!
- Don't panic! - I think the whole situation was amusing her -  I'll just do something to relax you and turn your mind away from those toxic thoughts.
-What? - I wasn't sure I liked that she was amused...
- You'll see.

***
She left the keys on the counter and told me to go to the bathroom if I needed to.
I went, and I realized I was already wet! Thank god for the daily pads! I changed it and went back into the unknown.

She was sitting on the couch. She had a wooden spatula on the coffee table.

- Come here. - she pointed to the spot in front of her. I could hear my blood pumping in my ears. I must have blushed. I could see that this is just a play. She wasn't truly strict or angry. I was wet and scared at the same time.
I got to the spot, her beautiful eyes locked with mine and then I remembered the cellulite. She started lifting the skirt but I stopped her and held her hands.
- I really have cellulite.
- Honey, everybody does. - she said with a sweetest comforting smile, and then her face changed into a toppy one. - Now, let go of my hands or I am taking the spatula. - her hands free, she lifted the skirt, rolled her eyes and with a hpmf said "cellulite" which was helpful for my self-esteem, although I wasn't sure she really meant it. At least she wasn't disgusted... at least... I was hoping she wasn't...  She let my skirt fall back down, but took my forearm.
-OK, now, come here - she said as she was pulling me to her lap.
-No, no... wait, wait. -  She stopped, while still holding my forearm and waiting for me to say why she was waiting. I was incredibly nervous, despite waiting for this moment my whole life.
-Yes?
-well... nothing... I am just scared...
-Oh, you should be - she said, while suppressing a chuckle. And, then, my butt was over her lap! She held my waist to adjust the position. There were ten thousand thoughts in my head and none of them was intelligible.
 It was so wonderful, and intimate, and close, but at the same time I felt waaaay tooo exposed and I was worried I looked funny and fat and ... She put her hand on my back and the other one on my thigh.
-Better?
-No!
- Ok, breathe...- She was rubbing my back, and I started  feeling so peaceful, when a thought popped into my head:
-Am I too heavy? - I said as I was trying to get up and lift my weight off of her.
In the next second she pushed me down and started spanking sooo fast! SLAP Slap-slap-slap!
- Robin! - She lifted my skirt up and continued the speedy spanking. The noise of the slaps was so strange. I wished she would scold me, like in the stories. Also, at first I thought that her hand must hurt more than my butt but then the sting started building up.
- Honey...? Robin ?? - she was not slowing down...  This time I tried to get up because it hurt, but her hand on my back wasn't letting me budge. And the spanks became harder!! I did not expect that!
- It really hurts now!
-The next time you try to escape I am taking the spatula.
- But it hurts...
- But it's a spanking! -  She said mockingly. However she was slowing down and making the spanks lighter. She finally laid her hand on my burning butt.
- Is it over? - I was on the verge of crying. Not only because of the sting, which wasn't so bad, but because of some pent up feelings I couldn't even define,... and also because it dawned on me that I have somebody who will spank me if I make mistakes, and somebody who actually doesn't mind the things I hate about my body! I couldn't wait to kiss her and hug her.
- Almost. I will give you five spanks with the spatula just so you know what you're getting yourself into if you break the rules.
- But, Robin... - I started whining...
- Are you ready, honey?
-No.... Roooobin... - I was still whining.... when she changed her tone:
-Get ready.- splat!
-OOOOOOOOOOuch! ouu...That was baA- Ad! Ooo-one ouch was enough! Robiiiin!
-It's over now. Come - She welcomed me into a hug.
- Honey... I thought I was going to get turned on by this, but it actually hurt!
- You will get turned on when it's a play spanking, and it will hurt a whole lot more if you disobey or break any rules. - With that she hugged me and held me like she was happy I existed. My God these feelings are so wonderful, especially after years of Selena's indifference and coldness.


*(these are character's thoughts, as a writer, I am aware of the horrors of anorexia...)

Robin 2

I spent 2 hours trying to make up my mind whether I wanted to go to a birthday party. I was invited after I had texted Happy birthday text to  Selena's friend's husband. I was always Selena's ...what would I call it... plus one... or ... puppy... you know the person who follows her and then everybody else accepts that out of pity she will sometimes take me to parties where I don't know anyone. And then her good friends got to know me, so me going somewhere with her became normal.  And eventually, since I am not too sociable, her friends became the only people I saw.
But, that day, I just couldn't make myself go there... I remembered that sometimes I don't even have anywhere to sit or anyone to talk to on that couple's parties. And, before, when I was obsessed with Selena it was a joy to be where she is, it didn't matter that I was the odd person out. Well, not exactly joyful... but that suffering was better than being home alone and lonely, away from Selena.
This time, however, I went into one of my decision paralyzed modes. When I have to leave the house sometimes I just can't make myself do it, and I usually end up cancelling whatever obligation I had because I run out of time to actually get there.
I got used to keeping my shitty moods to myself. Selena does not approve of such spoiled and impolite behavior like being depressed or getting into a vicious circle of thoughts you can't snap out of.
So, although I wanted to call Selena and see whether she's going, I ended up not doing anything but sitting on the bed and every once in a while realizing that I have stopped breathing and I am clenching my teeth trying to think of what to do. She didn't call me either, but that was not a surprise. Nervous and in a bad mood I was trying to watch a TV show when Robin called me.
-Robiiin!
- Hey, kiddow, you're back from the birthday?
- No, I didn't go.
-Why?
- I... - what to tell her? The truth might scare her off or bore her... ; lie... is not a good thing especially in the beginning of a relationship when it is equal to misrepresenting oneself ...
She sighed.
- Ok, the pause is telling me that you are thinking of what to tell me...and I don't want to hear anything but the truth. If you don't feel like telling me, it's ok, just please promise not to lie to me.
-aamm.. - I was so taken aback. I wasn't sure what to make of it... Except that she is freakin' smart! - I want to tell you, but I am scared that you might ...
-... not like you anymore? - she said and laughed.
-Yes...
- Ok, then, lets be brave...
-Easy for you to say!
-OK, kiddow, start talking! - and so I did, as fast and as detached from my emotions as I could (and I am pretty successful at both - years of practice)
-Woow... first... you can really talk fast... second... that is an issue we can solve... I am just sorry you didn't call me when you felt the mind freeze. I could have helped you.
- How? You're far away...
- Well, from your story I gather that you actually wanted to go this time, so I would have threatened you with a spanking if you didn't get ready right away. And you would send me selfies from the shower, the bus, the party and so on...
- And what if I didn't obey? - I asked with a broad smile. I've always wanted this!!! My whole life! And here she was in my life! The perfection!!
-Well, you would do it only once. And as I remember, I owe you a spanking from the parking lot. After that one you would obey me...
- I can't wait for you to come back!! - I said longingly and she out right laughed.

Robin 1

My heart is beating like crazy. I've dreamed about a woman like Robin my whole life. I am still terrified that at any moment she will realize that I am not good enough for her because she is so... everything I am not. What could she possibly like about me?

I haven't worn a dress in forever and now I am sitting next to her, make up and everything.
My best friend is across from us. Well, she is my best friend but I am not hers. Until recently she was the person I wanted to be my Top, but she is straight and not at all into it. She has been in my focus for more than 5 years and now, there is this wonderful creature next to me.

Selena is talking constantly like she always does when she is uncomfortable. She can see that there is something going on between her former high-school friend and her 18 year old younger puppy who used to follow her around and adore her. She knows I am kind of homosexual, more homo romantic, but I am not sure that she ever paid attention to me emphasizing that.

 Selena looked at me differently when she saw me all dressed up. I usually wear jeans (regular, not skinny!) and a baggy T-shirt. She hates how I dress but tonight she was impressed. Selena and I were sitting at the same cafe where I had first met Robin. And then SHE entered, majestic and nonchalant. I stood up immediately, but Selena was closer.

They casually said hi to each other and then Robin looked at me. I think I saw lust in her eyes! It was the first time I ever saw that in woman's eyes!

She approached me slowly. I was terrified of what would happen next. My country isn't too LGBT aware or open. It's not too bad, but lesbians are extremely rarely seen.

I went for a hug and got a wonderful long, long hug. I usually hug with my eyes closed but I was too nervous and opened them to see that nobody was paying attention.
While we were sitting Robin kept touching my hand, or lightly and quickly going through my hair. I hugged her couple of times when she said some nice things to me.

At the end of the evening, she had to leave early, so I went with her to her car and we kissed in the dark empty parking lot.

I almost felt aroused. I am sure she did as well. But she used her will power to stop.
- ...I have to go, kiddow...  - she took my face in her hands - I am sorry... I'll make it up to you.
The fact that she was leaving for a whole week made me incredibly sad and when I realized that she could realize her mistake in starting to date me I felt petrified.
- Hey, hey.. kiddow...what's happening! No crying... - she was alarmed, but then in a split second she became stern...  I thought to myself  "distant Selena all over again" and I went for a hug to prove myself wrong, but she stopped me and took my face in her hands again.
-No. Talk to me. What is happening?
 - I am sorry - I sniffled.- Nothing... I am sorry for ruining everything...
- woooow... wait. You didn't ruin anything and you won't. You could make me late, though, if you don't tell me why you are crying. - since I wasn't saying anything because I felt anything I say would be wrong, she continued - because if you don't I will have to spank you right here... and I would definitely be late then...
Her voice sounded determined, a little bit strict, but most of all she looked like she was actually planning what would be the best way to do it. I felt calm and comforted that that was her solution. Not leaving me, or becoming distant, or changing her mind about me, or ignoring my feelings ... in summary none of the things Selena would do. I smiled happily.
-Now, ... everything is really ok. - And with that I wrapped my arms around her. I hadn't felt such emotional closeness with anyone in such a long time. She held me tight and as she was kissing my hair she said:
- So, I owe you a spanking when I come back.
- Yes! - I said as if she were promising the most wonderful thing in the world. She laughed at my answer...
A whole week passed before I found out why it was so funny.